Moss has been acting strange lately, and poor Willow is not amused. Moss has been trying to bonk Willow, but Willow is dressed. Willow is Moss's daughter. Since he is having problems having a bonk, he has been going moody in the room, sitting at my feet, which is not Moss because the room is always to hot for him. Then he goes and sits on other side, then on opposite side, a bit fidgety. So, I can only guess he is sexually frustrated. I mean it is not lack of trying, he just keeps getting knock backs, poor Moss. 
So I decided to go and visit a shop down the road, which has a board for people advertising in. The Rod & Gun shop, owner is very polite, nice guy, and he has a dog too, so he should hopefully understand his problem. In I popped and asked him,"Can I put a notice on your board?", "What do you want to write?" He was ready to fetch his note pad and pen and take notes. "Male dog looking for female to bonk, well groomed, great personality, good natured, perfect role model, doesn't drink.... He looked at me and replied "Doesn't smoke either, eh! No!" "Why not?" I asked, "there could be someone out there looking for a perfect male for their female dog". He said the public may start complaining. So since I can't advertise in shops, I will just have to do it myself.  (not literally).
Please consider my advertisement: Male Border collie with a bit of spaniel, looking for a female to bonk.
Very good natured, great personality, very friendly, always well groomed. (Most of the time)
Doesn't smoke, doesn't drink, doesn't take drugs, and understands yours feelings.
He loves a bit of 'tLC? and ?CHALK?.*
She needs to be willing, sexy, good imagination and undressed when he arrives.
He would make a perfect role model for puppies, CSA not included. *(cuddles, hugs and a lot kisses) |